Letters From the Labyrinth 225 - Brian Keene
Hi. I'm Brian Keene and this is the 225th issue of Letters From the Labyrinth, a weekly newsletter for fans of my work. Previous issues are archived here. Because we skipped last week, this issue will be double-sized.
So, last week got off to a good start. As evidenced by the picture above, I signed signature sheets for both the hardcover and paperback editions of STORIES FOR THE NEXT PANDEMIC, and also worked on PROJECT: CASTLE, MONSTERS OF SAIPAN, and THE DRIVE-IN: MULTIPLEX.
On Thursday, all of that went out the window. Here is what happened.
I've been angling to get a Covid vaccine since they became available. Here in Pennsylvania, that means you register with every single place that is giving them out, and hope for the best. It's quite similar to playing the slots in Vegas, truthfully. I was registered with Wellspan, Pinnacle Health, Lehigh Valley Hospital network, Rite Aid, Weis Markets, and several others.
I finally hit the jackpot with the Vaccinate Lancaster Alliance, and scored an appointment to get my first dose last Thursday. I arrived on time. The vaccination center was the former Bon Ton inside the dying Park City Mall. This amused me, since that particular mall, and that particular Bon Ton (along with the Galleria Mall and Bon Ton in York County, just n the other side of the river from the Park City Mall) were the inspirations for the fictional mall in SUBURBAN GOTHIC by myself and Bryan Smith.
I was impressed by the efficiency and expediency of the folks running the vaccination center. Everything was professional and ran with military precision. My appointment was 10:45, and at 10:46 I was seated in a row with other patients -- each of us spaced six feet apart. I read over the literature on the Pfizer vaccine, which is what I was being given, and studied my vaccination card. The nurse came over with her cart, and made sure I wasn't allergic to anything in the Pfizer vaccine (which to the best of my medical knowledge, I wasn't).
She put the shot into my left arm, right in the center of one of my tattoos, and told me if I began to feel any reaction to just raise my hand. She left a pink post-it note with a time written down on it of when I could leave.
Within the first minute, I felt a stinging, burning sensation in my armpit, near the injection site. Then it ran up my neck. It felt like ant venom rushing through my artery. Those of you who have been stung by fire ants will know the sensation I'm talking about.
I thought, "Hmmm. Wonder if that's normal?"
Then my lips started to tingle. Deciding not to fuck around, I raised my hand. The nurse was several people in front of me, and her back was turned. The guy seated in front of me turned around, and his eyes went wide, and he called for her. Apparently my face was red.
She rushed over and asked what I was experiencing, and I told her. My lips were really numb now. A few more volunteers rushed over. They called on their radio to have someone come get me, and said that I was having a reaction. I decided to text Mary, Cassandra, and my mother. I have a group text set up with them for situations like this, so that whenever I get set on fire or stabbed or have a heart attack or get bitten by ants, I can alert all three of them at the same time. (Ask them how often things like this happen). I tried to open my phone screen but I realized then that my hands were shaking too bad. I dropped my phone and my vaccine paperwork. The nurse snatched them up for me, and a male volunteer leaned over me and said, quote "Yeah, you're not looking good. We're going to get you out of here."
They put me in a wheelchair and zipped me past several concerned looking people waiting in line. I grinned with numb lips and said, "Don't let this dissuade you." The guy wheeling me said, "You were in the military weren't you?" Not the first time I've been asked that. I guess cracking jokes in times of duress is a sign of that or something?
They took me into an observation room occupied by three nurses, a doctor, and three other people who I assume had an adverse reaction, as well. They took my blood pressure and freaked out because it was 195 over something (I don't remember the other number). Apparently my pulse was racing, as well. The head nurse, Val or Vicki or some other V name that I can't remember anymore -- said that I was in stroke territory. Not for nothing, but if your patient's blood pressure and heart rate are alarmingly high, telling them they are abut t have a stroke is probably not conducive to lowering those things.
While I didn't much care for Nurse V's bedside manner, I didn't have to deal with her long. Another patient was wheeled in behind me, and I was left in the care of Nurse Tracy, who was awesome.
Eventually, after about 45 minutes total, my blood pressure and heart rate returned to normal, my complexion cleared, and my lips were no longer numb. I was cleared to leave if I wanted to.
Nurse Tracy told me that I was not the first person who she had seen this happen to. The doctor on duty, who was very busy, confirmed the same.
None of them new if I should get the second vaccine or not. They instructed me to ask my family doctor -- which I don't have, since I don't have health insurance. What I have is the local clinic, so I have an appointment there for Monday, to get their advice on whether I should get the second dose or not. I would very much like to get it.
I was weak and exhausted Thursday and Friday, but other than the reaction, I only experienced what seemed like the worst headache of my life. Today (Saturday) I seem t have recovered completely, except for some remnants of fatigue.
I've talked to some other folks about what happened, because I'm still not clear, and the nurses were overwhelmed and I didn't have time to ask them. All I had to go on was Nurse Tracy's confirmation that she'd seen this happen to other patients as well. Since then, I've had another nurse tell me that a colleague of his had the same reaction I did. A doctor friend has confirmed the same. My former podcast co-host Dave Thomas says he had the same reaction to a chemo drug. Author Edward Lorn says he had that reaction during a different vaccination when the needle hit a nerve. And author Geoff Cooper, himself an EMT, says he is of a mind that maybe I had a stress response.
I don't know who is right and who is wrong. And that's what's scary about this virus -- the uncertainty. The known unknowns. We know that we don't yet know what all the side effects are. We know that we don't know what the long term efficiency will be. We know that we don't know whether it will stand up against variants and mutations, many of which are already circulating amongst the populace. And we don't seem to know what happened to me, other than I had a rare -- but apparently not unheard of -- reaction.
This virus isn't evil, but it is scary.
To not get this vaccine, to not protect myself and my loved ones and the people of my community -- that's scary, as well.
And for a guy who makes his living scaring people, and who has also faced down death a dozen or so times now, it isn't any less scary. In fact, it's probably more terrifying. I'm scared to death about what might happen if I get this second dose. And I'm absolutely fucking terrified at what might happen if I don't.
The hardcovers of STORIES FOR THE NEXT PANDEMIC and THE SHAPES OF NIGHT are sold out, but there is still time to pre-order them in paperback. Remember -- they're sold as a two-book set, so you're paying one low price for both books. And all of the paperbacks come signed by Mary and myself, just like the hardcovers.
STORIES FOR THE NEXT PANDEMIC
by Brian Keene
Written during the 2020 Pandemic, the stories in this new collection from bestselling, award-winning author Brian Keene are an eclectic mix of quiet slow burn terror, extreme horror, splatterpunk, bizarro and weird fantasy. In a year of deep divisions among humankind, STORIES FOR THE NEXT PANDEMIC is an evocative, atmospheric, and frightening look at the fears that still unite us…and the end that awaits us all.
THE SHAPES OF NIGHT
by Mary SanGiovanni
Sometimes, in Bloomwood County, New Jersey, children go missing. Sometimes those children die. And sometimes, strange and alien shapes of night resurrect the bodies of those children for their own. When Tim Jenkins has a terrible vision of one of his former students, Charlie Bentner, being mangled to death, he seeks Charlie out and unknowingly entangles both of them in a battle against time and space itself, a race against the shapes to stop an evil from entering our world and changing its geometry forever.
Agan -- $21 for two signed paperbacks. Available only for a limited time exclusively via the Thunderstorm Books website.
The latest addition to the merchandise line-up are the classic covers of CASTAWAYS by myself and FOUND YOU by Mary— both now available on t-shirts, hoodies, travel mugs and more. Click here to browse.
Director and Producer Jed Shepherd (HOST) has a podcast in which he talks to people from horror film and fiction. I was honored to be a guest this week. We discussed, among other things, my long career and why more of my stuff hasn’t been turned into movies. Listen for free here.
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I've begun hosting a live reading series that takes place every Monday night on Clubhouse. It starts at 8pm Eastern Standard Time. So far we've had myself, Mary, Jeff Strand, Matt Serafini, John Urbancik, Jonathan Janz, and Stephen Kozeniewski. It’s open to all. Join us!
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I'm sold on Clubhouse. I suspect it's the next phase of social media apps. But I also signed up for Slasher, which is a horror centric social media app. I'm on there as BrianKeene, if you wish to friend me.
A few years back, I wrote about the splintering of social media, and how we would see more and more specific, insular platforms focused on tribalism rather than the vast, all-encompassing platforms like Facebook and twitter. I think we're now heading toward that.
Me? I miss having message boards.
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There are two new episodes of DEFENDERS DIALOGUE available wherever you listen to podcasts.
For Episode 128, Steve Gerber, Len Wein, and Marv Wolfman offer three different takes on Marvel's macabre muck monster, as Christopher Golden and Brian Keene discuss Giant-Size Man-Thing issue 5. Plus, Chris and I recount their pitches for another Marv Wolfman-created property -- Night Force.
For Episode 129, the Man-Thing and Richard Rory battle the strangest super-villain of all -- The Scavenger! Plus, a defense of waitresses, Marvel super-fan Anthony Pezzella, and a digression about Gwendy's Button Box as Christopher Golden and I discuss The Man-Thing issues 19 and 20.
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Michaelbrent Collings, Jonathan Maberry, Scott Nicholson, JF Penn. TW Piperbrook, Mark Tufo ad Iain Rob Wright are giving away an entire library of signed books by themselves. Details here. Deadline is tomorrow (Monday).
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Cullen Bunn's Shadowman is up for pre-order via your local comic shop (until April 5th). If you're a horror comic fan, you'll want to check this out.
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I told you a few weeks ago about Tim Lebbon's Run Walk Crawl and Rio Youers' Lola On Fire. Both of those are now on sale and available via Amazon.
I've upped my exercise regimen over the last few weeks. I lift weights every morning while listening to either the early news or the previous day's Howard Stern Show. In the afternoon, after I've finished the day's writing and before I start cooking dinner, I take a two mile hike/jog through the woods. I say hike/jog because some days I do one of the other, and some days I do both.
I've also been rewatching all 40 seasons of Survivor. Yes, it has been on the air 20 years!
I loathe almost all reality television, but I love Survivor. I've been a fan since the first season. I'm a people watcher, and it's the ultimate in people watching. And I've been lucky enough to count a few contestants and a few production personnel as readers of my work over the years, so I've learned from them what it is really like. If anything, the cameras shy away from showing us just how grueling and physical and emotional the challenge can be.
My bucket list goals were go to Mars and compete on Survivor, and since I don't think Elon Musk will get us to Mars during my lifetime, I'm opting for the latter. I want to get my blood pressure down a little bit more, but otherwise, I'm in pretty good physical shape. I'm more than confident in my ability to deal with the survival aspects -- the elements, finding food and water, building shelter, etc. And I'm pretty confident in my ability to play the social aspects of the game.
As one person said on Twitter last week, I "would either be the first one voted off the island or I'd make it to the final three". And yeah, I'd say that's pretty apt.
Of course, before I'd get a chance to do any of that, I'd have to make it through the casting process. On average, 10,000 people apply each season. Out of those, 18 to 20 contestants are picked. And sometimes, a few of those contestants are recruited. CBS makes you sign a pretty thick NDA, so even if I did make it into casting, I wouldn't be able to tell you about it.
But rest assured, I'm applying. It's not a joke. I'm throwing my hat in the ring.
If I disappear for seven weeks during the next year or two, you'll know why, even if I can't tell you.
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Currently Listening: Been on a big Xander Harris kick this past week, and have been listening to pretty much all of his albums, including his URBAN GOTHIC album which was based on my novel.
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Currently Reading: The Crusaders, which was a batshit crazy comic book series from the Seventies and Eighties, in which a born-again evangelical former Special Forces Vietnam vet and a born-again evangelical former gang leader fight the forces of Satan. Each issue was like a giant Jack Chick Tract, and that's because they were produced by Jack Chick. The writing is as over-the-top and laughably offensive as the Chick Tracts themselves, but the art and coloring is often fantastic, and the horror elements are superb (particularly in the issues where they fight a Satanic cult and exorcise a demon in Africa). Basically, they are the comic book equivalent of William W. Johnstone's 'Devil' series, but they have nostalgic value for me.
And that's it for this week. If you have the means and ability, please consider pre-ordering the signed paperback set of STORIES FOR THE NEXT PANDEMIC and THE SHAPES OF NIGHT. You get them both for one price, and Mary and I sure will appreciate it.
Until next Sunday, be good to each other, make sure your loved ones know how you feel about them, and hang tough.
-- Brian